🔗 Share this article This Floating Excrement Was Far Too Meaningful! These Are the TV Disappointments of the Year. As we consider the television landscape of the past year, a handful of series emerge not for their brilliance, but for their notable shortcomings. Ranging from cringe-inducing spin-offs to confusingly poor docuseries, here are the programmes that left us utterly bewildered or simply reaching for the remote. The 'Sex and the City' Sequel How to start with this love/hate spin-off? Plagued with dreadful writing, cringe-inducing arcs (we demand better for Miranda!), and a mere 71 seconds of fan-favourite Samantha, the series fought to find its footing. For a moment, as the third season began, it looked like it had finally found its groove. Then arrived an episode centered on Seema’s natural deodorant. No wonder the creator announced this would be the last series. It concluded on a low point; the closeup of Miranda’s loo full of poo was simply too on-the-nose. Yet, fans undeniably had a hoot dissecting every single “wtf?” episode. And as Carrie – once again single – twirled around her sprawling townhouse to Barry White, who couldn't let out a little sob? All’s Fair ‘Can Kim Kardashian act? Of course she can’t.’ But that was almost the smallest of this drama's problems. The subject of a exceedingly uncommon zero star assessment, it was hard to know where to begin listing the problems. The laughably wooden dialogue? The tedious glorification of affluence and consumption? The almost deliberate parade of tropes? Performances so bad they felt borderline malicious? Let’s just say “each and every one” and never speak of this show again. However, a second season has been ordered, so we’re probably going to have to. The Charlie Sheen Documentary Given the restraining orders, abuse allegations and parental shortcomings, it’s fair to say Charlie Sheen has been a bad boy. Not you’d truly have known it from this three-part documentary which smirked its way at Sheen’s various episodes of self-destructive excess while struggling to tell us anything we didn’t already know. Instead, it felt as if this loose cannon was being pandered to, so any sympathy this show might induce should be reserved for the people who have had to endure proximity with this charming but flippant narcissist. The Supercomputer Drama Of course we knew it was ridiculous from the get-go: a drama about a AI known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or annihilate all of humanity. We persevered out of sheer love for its leads … but by the end, it felt like even they had stopped bothering. One barely reacted when his character died, and the other ended up hacking Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. Talk about admitting defeat. The Gangster Drama Dodgy figures convening in empty boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter jackhammering away in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its gangland drama back. In truth, that is unfair on the gangland dramas of the late 90s. Many seem a bit dated now, but at least they didn’t suffer the embarrassment of having to accommodate baffling dialects. But there were plenty of other problems. Mainly that it was just profoundly boring; a conflict over drug-selling territory between various London rogues which felt rather simplistic. With Love, Meghan Considering the extent to which she grinds the gears of the nation’s ostentatiously enraged commentators, it’s almost easy to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s televised forays into twee homemaking as intentional statements. But then you watch them and are forced to concede that actually, they may have a point. It’s like watching a homeware catalogue animated; a poster for wine o’clock with ideas of grandeur; a procession of sleeping dogs, buzzing beehives, sentimental sayings and pointless crafting “hacks” you’ll forget instantly. All supported by immense, mostly undeserved wealth. Ugh. Victoria Beckham There are obviously fascinating things to be discussed about regarding Victoria Beckham and her journey with career, self-image, self-worth. But for whatever reason, this documentary series chose not to explore them. Instead, the viewing was like reading a marketing brochure. She obviously has every right to bridle at what she describes as her “stern” image. But sadly, she failed to do herself any favours with this guarded non-event of a series. The Inheritance It should have been the next big hit – except even more extravagant, with a glamorous star as a deceased benefactor and a well-known personality overseeing her inheritance. What more could you want? As players battled it out, there was plenty of backstabbing and squabbling. But the rules quickly became incomprehensible: it’s even now too complicated to detail what precisely was happening. Even more regrettably, we only saw brief appearances of the star via filmed videos. The show ended up reeking of a production that was trying way too hard to emulate something far greater than it. Too Much How does one succeed a show that defined a generation? The pressure was immense for this glitzy romantic comedy about Jessica, a hopeful New Yorker who arrives in London with a broken heart. The lead actress seized the opportunity by the horns and was joyous to watch, reveling in Austen levels of romantic ideals. But it was all very slick and, ironically, was insufficient. Plus, the abundance of celebrity cameos involved felt icky. Mitchell & Webb Are Not Helping Not good enough to be ‘patchy’. Given the smart inclusion of gifted emerging comics, hopes were high. But sadly, most of it didn’t land. A particular sketch was a single joke stretched to a husk but recurring in every episode. One star seemed too ready to slip into a familiar ranting mode. The writing room sketches, in contrast, simply inspired the idea that they should probably have stayed in there a bit longer. The Knox Dramatisation This dramatisation of the story of Amanda Knox was overseen by Amanda Knox and pretty much exclusively showcased the perspective of Amanda Knox. So, while there probably is an interesting drama to be made about the horrific 2007 murder, this isn’t it. The subject matter needed to be handled with care. Instead, the series laboured awkwardly to find the right voice, lumbering from strangely jaunty, somewhat stylised farce to inevitably, real-life horror. Twisted? Arguably. A total mess? Very much so. The Maths Genius Thriller We admire the lead actor … but did we believe him playing the greatest maths genius in history, a man so smart he’s on the brink of a breakthrough that could ruin society? No! This international thriller about government agencies spying on – and eliminating – academics honestly got more absurd by the second. Silliness-by-numbers. 1000 Men and Me: The Bonnie Blue Story This hagiography followed the online personality renowned for sexual escapades as she undertook her biggest feat yet. What on earth would motivate her? What we wanted was far greater interrogation of her true psychology, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have interviewed the now-famous mum who showed up to drag her son away from the queue. What we got was horrific shots and zero critical analysis of her notoriety whatsoever. It's staggering to consider, the documentary-maker has a young daughter too.